Freedom Writers

Today Jenny and I showed "Freedom Writers" to our freshmen during our classes, and if you have never seen the movie, it's pretty good. It shows a new teacher working in the inner city, and how she creates a family within a class that is--at first-- completely controlled by gang-related hatred and racism. Although we have not had to deal with the same intensity of issues and hardships that the kids in the film were facing (true story, too), there have been problems related to the class system that is in play in Micronesia. In brief: there are some islands considered higher up in the system and others that are at the bottom, resulting in tension at times between students from the higher class islands and those from the perceived lower class islands.

I have one girl who comes from the island of Pelilieu, a Palauan island, who has shared her aggravation over being looked down upon by some of the Palauan students because she is from this separate island. They apply stereotypes to her that they hear their parents and peers talking about, and I can tell it hurts her a great deal. She is only one of the reasons we wanted to show the film; there have been other issues in the class of students from other islands feeling unwelcome by their peers because they are not from here. It broke my heart to hear one of my students finally confess to me that she wished the other girls would understand that she and her friends came here to get an education, not to step on anybody else's territory.

As a newcomer myself, I sometimes have a hard time knowing what I can do to help in this; how can I make a difference or help the girls see that we are all people: we need each other; we don't need to rip each other apart or degrade one another.

On a cool note: I did have an amazing breakthrough that I cannot take credit for, though it was so encouraging to hear. One of my students whom I had caught copying the back of a book and trying to pass it off as her free reading summary came to me today after the movie and said that because of the free reading journals I make them do (it's a 200 point project for the semester), she has actually realized that she loves to read!! You can imagine my jaw dropping off my face; she fought me last semester on my free reading requirements, and now she is shocking her mom (and me) by calling her up and saying "Hey! Can you bring me some books from our house? I really like to read now!" Her mom didn't believe her until the girl told her that she had finished an entire book! I was so happy and proud of her; and I have been thankful to not be having as many attitude issues with her this semester.

I really love this group of girls, and want to see them really grasping that they have the potential (as much as I hate that word) to do so much in this world.

Find a Happy Place!

I can remember my family always joking about this phrase whenever something awkward came up. Someone would yell "Find a happy place!" while another might shout "Run away! Run away!" as all good Monty Python fans should recognize. But really, sometimes we do need a place or space to be our "happy place;" somewhere to recenter and find tranquility in the midst of a pressing world.

This weekend I was able to go kayaaking in Koror with a woman about my age who is from Russia. Her name is Rayla, and she is working at the elementary school in Koror at the edge of the Emmaus campus. We took out a double kayaak, and in just a few minutes--without tipping over the kayaak, I might add!--we were paddling through dazzling turquoise water, slowly circling enormous rock islands. Although we could still hear the faint noise of the speed boats, it was incredible to find so much calm after the bustle and traffic of Koror. I know if I were to live in Koror I would need to have a kayaaking membership to get away!

At one point we paddled through a narrow opening between two rock islands to discover it wasn't a passage, but an alcove. All of a sudden it was like everything stopped: the noise was shut out, the air was calm, and we were drifting slowly, surrounded on all sides by towering rock islands like peace-keeping sentinels. The first impression that came to mind was "Be still and know that I am God." I know that whenever I need a moment to "find a happy place," my mind will retreat to the instant calm of that alcove. In this way, our souls need to find a place of rest in our Creator; in trusting Him to shoulder our heavy burdens.

So often I try to find peace in the wrong ways. I hide away and avoid, which creates feelings of guilt and greater frustration with myself, and does not bring peace. I think God is trying to teach me that I can rest in Him; I don't need to focus on my failures and frustrations, but let Him carry my burdens. He sees me not as good and holy because of anything I have done, but views me with spotless lenses and sees His Son: more specifically, what His Son has done for me--for all of us. I don't stand alone anymore, but have someone who two thousand years ago said He would stand for me. I have so much to learn about what this grace really means; but for now, I am learning to rest in Him.

Things that Go Bump (and have claws) in the Night

Only on Palau.....I know you could put just about any place into that sentence and come up with some great anecdotes, but really: there are some things that just don't happen everywhere. For example: how often do you find yourself alone in a computer lab at night, freaking out because you discover that the scuffling and scratching noise coming from under the table is, in fact, not a mouse, but a clawed--and possibly fanged--creature?? Ok, well highly unlikely to be fanged....but is in reality a land crab!! And might I add a dunce of a crab that will go BEHIND the wide open door, but not OUT of it so I can stop being paranoid about the safety of my toes. I would love to hear some of your "Only on/in (fill in the blank)" stories!!!